Amber Michelle's Debut!!! Stepping Out Of Her Shell!!

Hello everyone, my daughter, Amber Michelle, has finally come out as a writer. Below is a message along with an excerpt from her 1st novel she is working on. I think her writing is "awesome!!" Then again I might be a tad bit bias........................ "What??!!" She is my daughter. 


This is an excerpt from my first novel titled: Anna: Aucpreg & The Awakening!! 
Please give your advice/comments on my excerpt.

Anna could see the fire coming at her with a rate so rapid, that she could hear her heart, thumping to the beat of horror music. Engulfed in this fire was a woman (unscathed) with tears streaming down her face. Yet, somehow, her eyes illuminated with hope and joy. 
Anna in desperation, yelled, "Who are you, are you hurt, do you need help?" She knew she was asking too many questions, but the site of a woman engulfed in a fiery blaze, has a way of making you act frantically! Something behind the woman emerged; What is that.... is that a hand?....no claws!" Anna thought in pure terror. As the claws jerked the woman further into the blaze, she yelled to Anna, "Aucpreg!"
"What?, wait......." instinctively reaching for the blaze, the heat and pain reminded Anna where she was placing her hand.

Jerking her hand back with such force, caused Anna to find herself on the edge of her bed, about to hit the floor with a loud thud. Clutching the sheets for dear life, and still feeling the heat from the fire on her hand, Anna whispered in a confused tone; "Aucpreg??" © June 2014.

So, how did I do? Please give your advice/comments on my excerpt.
Please keep in mind that I am a very new 14 year old, (as of today to be exact), So please be kind with your constructive criticism. Thanks in advance for your feedback.